Breakdown

Tuesday is over, and the week is already ruined.  Steelers lost. I have slept on average 6 hrs a night at most. Seeing is that I am up at 2am and I have to be up at 630. I am already stressed. Already nervous. Already ready for summer break. Nothing makes me more nervous than my future. Thinking about how things are going to be in 330 days when B moves back home. Where I am going to be in school, will I be accepted into graduate school? If only there was a way we could time travel into the future, just to get the reassurance that life isn't that bad. To know that this last 11 months will fly by, and everything will go back to how it was 4 years ago when B first enlisted. I obviously feel for the other military spouses and girlfriends out there, just when I know the end is so close and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel - I just want it that much quicker. However, life doesn't work that way. So tonight, I had a breakdown. A breakdown that thank goodness B could attend to - at least via cellphone. He has been so busy with work-ups and just work in general for deployment we have not had much time to keep in touch and talk about the things going on in each other's lives. And everyone is getting all excited about Valentine's Day. My feelings = blah. This will be our 5th Vday. We have celebrated one. In my opinion, its nothing special. Just another day. We love our significant others every other day of the year to, right? However, I am not gonna put a damper on everyone who loves this holiday. Make the best of it this year (:

My plane ticket is booked and I am counting down the days until I board a plane to see B. I have 23 days and a whole lot of work to do between now an then. It is just wonderful to think about seeing him so soon, especially when the next time I will see him is going to possibly be Easter, but if not June and then December. BLAH = my feelings exactly. Thank goodness though for a shortish deployment. Shorter than last time and at least it has to do with him getting out and them not extending his contract or it would be much longer.

USMC I will be claiming my marine on JANUARY 6, 2012.

OOH-RAH!